At a Loss for Words

So I'm expected to write this speech for my best friend who passed away over three weeks ago.  I'm supposed to say it at her funeral.  But the truth is, I don't know what to say.

After accepting the Christian Life, I have no words of comfort that might help anyone who knew my best friend.  Well, I know that she believes in God, and she knows there is Jesus Christ.  But does she know that she was supposed to ask for forgiveness for her sins? Did she know that it might do her good to read the bible? To pray? To believe that she went to Heaven or she was accepted by the Father? I'm no expert in the Christian Faith. I'm new to it, and I'd like to do everything I can to secure myself to make sure that I'm ready when I'm called.

In the Christian faith I know that you must accept Christ as your savior (however that's supposed to be, I still haven't figured out if that means I realize that Jesus Christ is my way out, and I've got to do everything I can to ensure that Jesus Christ favors me to be one of those that he accepts in his arms), you must understand the gospel because the truth is in it, the realization is in it, and the promise is in it. If you don't know the promise then you don't stand a chance. 

And that is what I'm afraid of.  Does Jackie know what she needs to know? Is merely the fact of knowing Christ and believing in him enough to get her up there?  I'm so afraid for her.  I didn't think I needed to worry about her, but now I am worrying about her.

Again, as I thought earlier, at least there is one thing that comforts me in the midst of all this.  It is the fact that she will no longer be here when we go through famine, when we suffer hardships, when the world turns bad.  There is at least one comfort.  But I can't find comfort in where she is right now. For all i know, she could be burning in hell. cliche. Joke. I meant that as a joke. Rather, she could be swimming in oblivion.

And I'm still at a loss for words. I seriously don't know what I'm going to say tomorrow.  I'm lucky if I can put something together.  Oh, Jackie. If you could give me some sign that you were doing okay, I wouldn't worry so much.  But I know, like in the bible, how the Lord would not allow Lazarus to make contact with his family to so much as warn them, then I know I will never hear from you.

I miss you so much, and it hurts that you're gone. What hurts even more is the uncertainty of where you've gone; that you might have gone elsewhere instead of where we all wish to go. I'm not sure you'll be able to endure such pain, and I pray hard that something can be done.

I hope I get an answer before tomorrow because I don't know what empty words could do.  I could only pray for the people who still have a chance to redeem themselves, but I can't pray for the dead who have already submitted themselves before God. Only God can save them now, and I must do what I can to help people save themselves.

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